And it is the right of your spouse that you should know that God has made him or her for a tranquility and comfort in worry and a friend and shield against sins. And likewise it is incumbent upon both of you to thank God for one’s spouse and to know that one is a grace of God upon the other. And it is obligatory to have good fellow ship with this grace of God, and to respect him or her and be kind although the husband’s rights upon his wife are greater and her obedience is the final word in all the likes and dislikes of a husband so long as it is not a sin. So a wife has the right of love and fellowship; and place of repose so that natural desires may be fulfilled and this in itself is a great duty. And there is no strength but by God.
Responsibilities of Husband towards His Wife
1)To be kind to her and treat her well. (Q; 4:19)
2)He should not be ill-tempered towards his wife.
3)To forgive her if she does something wrong.
4)To supply her the food-stuff used by the people.To supply her more food-stuff
on `id days (festivals).
5)To prohibit her from doing something which may possibly entail evil.
6)Not to entrust the management of his affairs to her
7)To feed and dress his wife.
Family Love and relationship
1)A man’s words to his wife: “I love you” would never go out of her heart.
2)When one of you wants to marry a woman, let him say to her: “I accept the covenant taken by Allah”:...And
then (a woman) must be retained in honor or released in kindness. (Q; 2:229)
3)Verily the best of you is the best to his women; and I am the best of you to my
4)Marriage is a relationship of “rest”, “love” and “mercy”: “And of His signs is that:
He created mates for you from yourselves that you may find rest in them, and He
ordained between you love and mercy. Most surely there are signs for a people who
reflect.” (Q; 30:21)
5)“He it is Who did create you from a single being, and of the same (kind) did He
make his mate that he might incline to her...” (Q; 7:189)
6)May Allah bless the man who does good between himself and his wife; as Allah the
Exalted has given him authority over her and made him her guardian.
7)Imam Sajjad (a.s.):If you like a person, make your friendship known to him,
because doing so guarantees friendship all the more and becomes the means of the
firmness of love between the two parties.
8) “...Marry such women as seem good to you.” (Q; 4:3)
The Rights of Women
1)The Right to study:Seeking knowledge is a duty imposed on all Muslim males
2) The Right to work:Both man and women are given the right to work.
Matrimonial rights and family system come first in Islam. It is obligatory for the
wife to protect family life and take care of household duties.
3)The Civil Rights:Woman, like man enjoys full legal rights. She may inherit, buy,
sell, give, take, conclude contracts, etc. In Islam, the woman has an independent
personality, and her obligations are independent from those of her father, husband
or brothers. Thus, the woman in Islam enjoys all rights and is treated equally to
man in this respect.
4)The Political Rights:“O Prophet! If believing women come to you, taking oath of
allegiance to you that they will ascribe nothing as partner to Allah, and will neither
steal nor commit adultery nor kill their children, nor produce any lie that they have
devised between their hands and feet (forged) nor disobey you in what is right,
then accept their allegiance and ask Allah to forgive them. Surely Allah is
Forgiving, Merciful”.(Q; 60:12).
This Oath of allegiance is obligatory on women and men and it is the acceptance of
the Imam (Head) of the Islamic nation.
5)Look for goodness in the beautiful faces, as their deeds are apt to be good.
6)Do not marry to ill-tempered or drunkardman.
7)Wed not idolatresses until they believe; and certainly a believing bondwoman is
better than an idolatress even though she should please you; and give not
(believing women) in marriage to idolaters until they believe, and certainly a
believing slave is better than an idolater even though he should please you. These invite to the Fire, and Allah invites to the Garden, and to forgiveness by His grace, and expounds thus His revelations to mankind that they may be mindful.” (Q; 2:221)
Social Etiquettes in marriage relationships
The right of a companion
Imam Sajjad (a.s.):It is the right of your companion to be gentle and agreeable to him or her and to do him or her justice in conversation andwhile looking at him or her, do not take away your eyes from him or her at once. While talking, your aim should be to make him or her understand. And if you have gone to sit with him or her, you are at liberty to take your leave. But if he or she has come to sit with you, he or she has the option and in this case you should not leave that meeting without his or her permission. And there is no power but with God.
The right of a partner
Imam Sajjad (a.s.):It is the right of a partner that you should take his or her burden upon yourself if he or she is absent and to work equally when he or she is present. Do not decide anything without his or her consent and do not enforce your view without consulting his or hers. Save his or her wealth for him or her and protect his or her account against embezzlement. It does not matter whether that malpractice is great or small because this sermon of the Holy Prophet reached us,”Surely the Hand (bliss) of God is upon partners so long as they do no swindle each other.” And there is no power but with God.
3)Peace:Be patient and tolerant with him who has behaved rudely with you.
4)No abuseDo not quarrel with the people, because doing so destroys one’smagnanimity and personality and eliminates compassion.
5)RespectDo not get angry but control your anger because controlling one’s anger is the means of respect in this world as well as in the Hereafter. A person who will control his anger in spite of being in an authoritative position will be filled with faith and will be saved from the anxiety and depression on the Day of Judgment.
“...and if you fear that you cannot do justice (between your wives) then (marry) only one...”
Anyone who has two wives and does not behave with them with justice and shows more
inclination to one than the other, he will be resurrected on the Day of Judgment, and one side
of his body will be dragged along the ground till at last he shall enter the Fire.
If any man gathers a number of women around him and is incapable of giving them full sexual satisfaction, and, as a result of this, these women are led to adultery and promiscuity, that person is answerable for the sin of these illegal acts.